Philip Banks (1945–2013) is a lawyer and Carlton's father. He is also the uncle and caretaker of Will. He was once a royal guest at Hyrule Castle, and briefly served as Attorney General of the United States as a member of the Harkinian administration. However, King Harkinian banished him from Hyrule when he objected to Harkinian's banishment of Mr. Bean. Due to his dietary habits, he suffers from frequent heart attacks, which ultimately caused his death. Confusingly, he gave the eulogy at his own funeral.
- Donald Trump tried to buy his house in 1994.
- His attempts to win political office failed because his true goals of filling the streets with banks and running a bank-making operation out of his banks were discovered.
- He hates My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, and he gets angry whenever he catches Will and Carlton watching it.
- He is sexually aroused by food, especially Swedish meatballs, and often talks to himself about turkey, mashed potatoes, tiny onions, and "cream sauce."
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